The Mid-Life

Yes, I know I am always apologizing. I guess it would be difficult for me to be a writer. Or least it would be difficult for me to be a writer that has to have a weekly column in order to get a paycheque. I am a bit inconsistent. Then again writing could be my full-time job. I would be a bit thinner and, "oh yeah", I would have that writers block and it would be over.

So the day job it is and the inconsistency that comes with it.

I am in Chicago this weekend, I will get to that story later, but first I have to get you caught up on the last couple months. I might have about 3 posts this weekend (intoxication permitting). If writing was feast or famine - this would be a feasting month.

I had permission to have my mid-life crisis in July. Yeah I bought the Jeep pictured above.  35" tires - like gliding along on 4 water balloons. It's a lot of fun. How did it come to pass? Well, I'll tell you. Several years ago I mentioned to my wife that for my 50th birthday I wanted to get a Jeep. I always wanted one and I wanted to make it happen as a birthday present to myself. It was agreed.

However; in July (the 2nd) to be exact, I received a phone call at about 3:30am.

Alt37's bedroom, wife blissfully snoring away

Ring, ring, RRRIIIIINNNNNGGG

Alt37: Hello (groggy)

Unidentified person: Dad (person now identified - to be referred to from now on as "The Plug")

Alt37: What's up (still very groggy)

The Plug: You know on the highway, the turn, the Aveo, the...

Alt37: (still groggy but starting to get near the edge of the fog) Not quite sure what you are talking about. (cut off by The Plug)

The Plug: I GOT INTO AN ACCIDENT!

Alt37: Are you ok? Was anyone with you?  blah, blah, blah

The Plug: I am fine, no one was hurt.

Alt 37: We will talk in the morning.

The Plug: Can you come and get us.

Alt37: No (disconnect phone)

I actually totally enjoyed my film class that I took earlier this year. Writing a story as a screenplay is fun. I really should film that donut shop short.

Anyway back to the story. My son found his way home and sat on the floor in the dining room awaiting his scolding and subsequent beating. I ended up coming out there to take care of the cats and almost tripped over him (I didn't expect a kid to be sitting in the middle of the floor - yes I was pretty much walking around with my eyes closed).

I told him to go to bed and I would give him shit later.

Enough of that - a day or so later I got word that my car was a write off. I looked at my wife and she told me that I could start my mid-life crisis about a year and a half early.

I got my Jeep - however; every Sunday I have to take her for a drive in it with the top off. I guess it is a small price to pay.

The Plug - well  he has no car to drive. Charges pending. Life's lessons learned. He will be OK.

WOW Stuff

Taking time off from the game. I was in the Mists of Panderia beta and it drove me nuts. I realized that I was leveling characters that would disappear when the game came out. I thought, "what a waste of time". Yes that was a Sheldon Cooper oxymoron moment. Watch the Big Bang Theory - WOW account getting hacked episode - you will understand.

Instead I have been playing World of Tanks. My son recommended it and it is absolutely awesome. Free to play. I am sure I will get the new WOW expansion in September, but for now this is a lot of fun.

Conclusion

I think I am done this installment. I have one more before I begin the current - Chicago Trip installment.

Have a great day!

Time

It's November - Christmas is about 53 days away and the local department stores are setting up their displays. This year seems to be just flying by. My daughter turned 13 and showed me a photo of her kissing her "boyfriend" at the halloween dance a couple days ago. I almost had a stroke. Everything is moving too fast.

Even in WOW, Blizzard announces a new expansion and all you see everywhere is Panderia this and Panderia that. It's like they put up the Christmas decorations and we still have to get through Thanksgiving (US) still and Patch 4.3. I know there had to be the hype element, but seriously - do you think it will be released in July 2012 like the polls at WOW Insider are suggesting. I guess Blizzard needs to make their money before the end of the world - JK.

I am also trying to come to grips with my advanced stages of "oldtimers". Where I think to myself, "What just happened? This would be a great blog article.", only to forget it in a blink of an eye. I guess I will have to start taking some notes on my travels.

So I am going to try and list the things that have happened in the last few weeks that I thought were somewhat interesting to me (in no particular order - Oldtimers).

Halloween

From my Facebook status, "Ok - Halloween night - So what does it mean when the lights get turned out? Oh yeah - the candy is gone. Some kids need to learn some Halloween etiquette."

I turned off the lights and I was still getting the odd group coming to the door for candy. Really? Use your Tim Horton job money and buy your own candy. One "kid" that did come to the door was standing 6'4". At least he came at a reasonable hour and had a full understanding of Halloween etiquette. The knock, the "trick or treat", the passing of candy, the "thank you". Good job - now go out and get one.

Another woman brought her 2 month old to the door. Again, really? Pretty sad.

Martial Arts

A couple of weeks ago I got a pretty good "George Horse" to my left knee. I say "George" because it was way more severe than a standard "Charlie Horse". Almost a full 3 weeks of hobbling around, apparently with the "oldtimers" there is a slowing of the physical healing as well.

My program that I am developing for a city in Ontario is going well. A lot of the drafts are done and I am working on the instructors guide. Working on getting some photos done because there is only so much you can describe without a picture being required for that extra thousand words.

Looking forward to the submission and the people who hired the expert, telling the expert how he should be doing it. Should be interesting.

WOW Stuff

One word, "overwhelmed". Patch 4.3 is coming out and I have barely read any of the patch notes. I am not even sure what is happening in it. Then the expansion announcement comes and really causes a cataclysmic upheaval to my WOW world. The talent changes alone were giving me a headache. Remember, I am the guy with the 37 alts. I rely on cookie cutter. I guess time will tell.

With the "Mists of Panderia" coming, and the new race and class, have you parked any names for your new monk toon? Let me know. I wanted to use "TheyCallMeBruce", but lo an behold I was 3 characters short, so I parked, "CallMeBruce". The original movie - "They Call Me Bruce" was screened in 1982, I think I enjoyed it, what 29 years ago.

Arrr! I am now a pirate.

For those of you following my tweets and Facebook status updates the last couple weeks, you may have been confused by a number of my entries referring to pirates. Well you see, since Bear died 2 months ago, I have been very much missing him. I have been looking for just the right tribute to his life. My wife and I have been searching for just the right headstone for our back yard when we inturn him later this month. So I decided to get his portrait tattooed on my left thigh. My theory is that "man's best friend" always sits to your left. So Bear will now, always be at my side.

The reference to pirates extends from my theory that only pirates and sailors should be allowed to have tattoos. As for women, our indigenous people of northern Canada tattoo their chins. So obviously a female getting tattooed secretly wants to be an eskimo, or sailor or pirate. But we know the later isn't a good idea because of the superstition of having a female on a boat. Usually a Kraken comes and swallows it up. At least that is what Disney taught me.

So for the last few weeks I have been studying up for my pirates exam and at the end I got my pirates license a beautiful piece done by Bob Paulin, owner of Studio123 in St. Catharines, ON. I celebrated with Mr. Christie Pirate cookies and rum.

For those of you that said I would cry - it tickled except around the knee when Bob was working over where my common peroneal nerve is available for striking. Those of you that take a real martial art (not MMA) should know were that is. Did I strike a "nerve" with that comment.

WOW Stuff

Speaking of Eskimo women, one of our guildies was lamenting a few months ago that he wanted to make a guild of just paladins. Now I am sure this isn't something new, a group of 12 year olds probably already beat us to the punch. We laughed it off in Mumble (really try this it is good), but the other night we were bored (the guildie that suggested it was on vacation and wasn't there) and decided we were going to start toons on a new realm, from scratch and form a new guild of just Dwarf Paladins. The realm we chose was Shu'Halo (NA) and the guild we created is called, "Seal Cub Clubbers Club". In case you haven't figured out the connection from Eskimo women to WOW it is - Seal Cubs.

Now we are having fun running around as just dwarf paladins, but I am sure we will have to have a talk about other classes as well if we decide to run any of the big boy content when we get to that stage. However; I think we will limit the races to dwarves (so whichever classes are associated with dwarves), from there we may have to extend it to other vertically challenged races (gnomes).

I have never played a dwarf - so I am seeing their content for the first time. You can actually see more of the content. Following behind a Tauren is a bitch - even totally panned out.

Anyway, off to help my daughter pack for her 2 week basic training course in Trenton (she is in Air Cadets). Before she goes, I think we will practise a bit of our baton stuff. Just in case she needs to throw a beating into an unruly male cadet while she is away.

ARRR!

When It All Started

November 8^th 2008, that’s the date that my life changed. That’s the date that I became a certified geek and joined the ranks of millions. That’s the day I started playing World of Warcraft.

After posting the last article I began thinking back about how long I’ve been playing and, frankly, how quickly the time has past. I’ve grown from a struggling newbling to a struggling older player that’s short 15 bucks a month for the past year and a half ($270). I find it interesting how things have changed for me. How complex this game can be and how, after a basic understanding of certain vernacular, simplistic the game can become.

I remember the first night I played. My buddy was a long time player and had MANY characters on MANY realms. Before we left work on that faithful fall day he told me to give him a call once I start my character and he would come and help me get acquainted.

This is the unedited email chain from the day after that conversation.

Alts (friend)-

“I was waiting all night to give you a hand - I crafted a bunch of stuff for you to make life easier. What level are you now?’

Nebz (me)-

“I didn't realize that I couldn't just 'txt' you in game, this frigin' game is huge! I'm currently a level 9 Warlock, and I've chosen to learn first aid, I'm an apprentice tailor and alchemist. I finally turned it off last night because I got lost in a place called the 'Undercity'. The last thing I did was train in one-handed sword fighting, cuz my guys a puss! I got attacked by a BIG ASS bear that killed me in one swipe!
I couldn't find my last three quests and I got lost so I finally went to bed. Some Elf was following me around last night throwing spells at me to strengthen my attacks, it was a very strange night.
Can I add one of your guys to my list?
Are you going to be on tonight?
Oh, and I finally found an Auction but apparently 'Trial' accounts can't use it.
Damn!”

Alts-

“You crack me up.

If you want to be an alchemist you need to take up herbalism (herbalism allows you to pick herbs which you need for the alchemy profession) which would require you to drop tailoring. You can only have 2 main professions. You can however take up cooking and fishing. You will have to buy some wood a flint and tinder, a fishing rod and lures to be able to do those things.

PS: you are addicted - welcome to the club.”

Holy crap!

A Shaman Gets Wet

What the hell Blizzard?

Are you freakin’ kidding me?

So I went on the damn water totem quest and two hours later I was finally able to obtain my Water Pole. Now I won’t rant about the obscene amount of travelling you have to do in order to complete this quest of futility. I also won’t complain about the fact that once you finally have the damn Pole in your bag it’s primarily useless. I will, however, complain about the fact that by going on this quest it takes a player out of the overall questing rhythm.

By the time you hit level 20 a player feels like they are finally hitting a bit of a questing cadence. Go out CLUB THE HELL OUT OF something and return to get your XP. Your spell rotation is starting to take shape and things seem to be happening fairly quickly. Then Blizzard throws this giant brick wall in your face and flips you the middle finger.

“Dear valued nerd. I understand that you’re trying to achieve greatness with your Shaman and kudos for sticking with it this long. But could you do us a favour and go wander around ALL OF AZEROTH for the next few hours. It would be most entertaining for us. Thanks.

P.S. We’re going to send you into zones that are above your level just so you can have your ass handed to you by a nomadic bear.”

Give me a break. I understand that they are trying to make the totems a bit of an achievement for the player. They’re trying to make you feel like you’re accomplished something. But come on, why the hell does it have to take so damn long and waste so much of my damn time? Why can’t the quest be a challenging battle with a powerful mob? Or even better, how about a damn quest that you are accompanied by an NPC. During the quest the NPC puts you into situations that require you to use specific totems. It would be a sort “training” quest and would allow the lonely shaman the opportunity to better understand the mechanics behind different totems.

Well, regardless of how much time I spent on this quest, the quest is over. The Water Totem is in my bag and I am able to move on into my 20’s.

A Shaman Gets Rolling

With that awful, awful fire totem quest in the rear view mirror (it really was just awful). Shammydavis is able to look ahead to the great span of levels that is 11 through 20.

I have to admit, I’m having a good time playing the Shammy. It hasn’t felt too gear dependent and even without the help of any heirloom items the levels have gone by fairly quickly. The only change to my rotation so far has come with the addition of the lightning shield. The lightning shield was an ability that I got back in the early levels. I just never used the damn thing that much, it didn’t seem necessary. As I climbed the levels I found myself buffing myself with the lightning shield before every pull. So my rotation went from Bolt, Bolt, Shock, CLUB THE HELL OUT OF THEM to Lightning shield, Bolt, Bolt, Shock, CLUB THE HELL OUT THEM, Lightning shield (reapply) and FINISH CLUBBING THE HELL OUT OF THEM!

As far as using that stupid fire totem, I have learned one very valuable lesson. Don’t use the fire totem. Lesson learned. See, the problem with the fire totem is the fact that, at this level, all it does is a ranged attack. But the ranged attack is completely uncontrollable, when you‘re finished CLUBING THE HELL out of a mob this damn pole of Satan will fire another attack at the next closest mob. Sometimes my totem would fire a shot at a passing squirrel, but other times it would fire a shot at a wandering mob. The mob would get all pissy and come over and first club the pole of Satan and then start CLUBING THE HELL OUT OF ME. So if I can pass along any advice it would be this; keep you totem in your pants, I mean bag (sorry). The only time I pull out my totems now is when I screw up and pull too many mobs. As soon as I recognize that the F’n Harpie I just sent a bolt at is bringing a couple of bitchy friends I frantically throw down any and all totems available to me. At this point that would be a totem to increase my armor and the pole of Satan. Then as soon as I am finished CLUBBING THE HELL OUT OF THEM, I retract my fire totem right away before it can get a shot off... and drink.

Oh, I have left out the greatest addition to my rotation. I have decided to become an Herbalist. The skill learned at level 75 herbalism is an instant cast heal over time spell and believe me I use this skill. Maybe more than the heal ability that Shamans learn from the trainer. Not only has Herbalism saved my life more than a couple of time it has also provided me with a nice little income on the side. All thanks to wonderful flower power.

Levels 11 through 20 have flown by and I now stand before you an adult Shaman. I wonder what wonderful skills I will get at level 20? I get a nice shiny new dinosaur mount, no more walking for this sucker. Off to the Shaman trainer to get my… oh crap… Water Totem quest.

Watch Out For That Spoon

I’m scared.

I am sure that we have all been following the upcoming class changes for Cataclysm. It all started with the changes to the Shaman class (Shammydavis is excited) and it finished with the Mage, or should I say, the updates were suspended with the Mage. Within all the updates there was one glaring exception, where’s the Paladin changes?

Now I know that Blizzard warned us ahead of time that the Paladin changes weren’t coming until the following Friday (April 16^th). But with all these changes, some good and some bad, we are left to wonder just how bad are these changes to the Paladin class that Blizzard has decided to wait an entire week before announcing them?

Any educated person knows that Blizzard is not taking the extra time to finalize the upcoming Paladin changes. These changes have been designed and finalized awhile ago. Blizzard has something different in mind. Blizzard is waiting for most of the crying (QQ) over the other class changes to calm down before dropping the Paladin Bomb on us. Good or bad, nerfed or buffed the Paladin changes are coming and apparently they need their own dedicated day to unveil them.

Personally I hope that the reason they are waiting is because they have no changes to the class to announce and they just wanted to give the Paladin class their own day. How great would it be if Blizzard published an article that said,

“Keep on truckin’ Pallies. We think you’re special just the way you are.”

Let’s just give the Paladin some kick ass level 81-83-85 talents and be done with it. But a betting man would place money on the fact that the Paladin is going to change drastically. So now all we can do is wait. At least we don’t have to wait until Friday anymore, Blizzard has pushed the date up to Wednesday (April 14^th). Good or bad the changes are coming at us like an angry Mom with a wooden spoon in her hand. So when the changes come and Blizzard swings that wooden spoon at your head just duck and try to push all the agro to your brother. After all he plays a Gnome Warlock, he deserves a spoon to the head!

A Shaman Hits Double Digits

Dear Blizzard,

SCREW YOU!

Thank you,
Nebz

So Shammydavis dinged 10 and with great power comes great responsibility. Finally, I was thinking, finally I can specialize in my chosen talent tree. Finally I can train in some kick ass abilities. But best of all I can finally get my fire totem and add a little dps to my shaman (insert fail sound effect here).

First let’s talk about the talent tree I have decided to pursue. A shaman has three choices (duh), Enhancement (two handed melee DPS), Elemental (DPS caster in leather/mail) and Restoration (healer). Now, personally I don’t have very much interest in trying to level Shammydavis through the Dungeon Finder (too many horrific runs with other toons). For leveling toons my poison of choice is good old fashion questing. Leveling a healer through questing is a matter of outlasting the mob you are currently poking and for me that doesn’t spell fun. So that narrows my choices down to caster or melee, and since I already have a level 80 mage, I decided to level as a melee (Enhancement).

Alright, we have a talent tree! Let’s look and see what I get to put my first point into on my journey to uberness. Ummm... ummm awesome… one point goes to raising my intellect by a hair. Nice. Great. Wonderful. Grand.

Well at least I get to go on my magical and mystical journey for the elusive fire totem. Now I won’t bore you with the specifics of my journey, but I will tell you that I wasted a total of 54 mins of my life on this damn quest. 54 mins! What the hell Blizzard?

Years ago I used to read a comic in the Saturday newspaper entitled “The Family Circus”. Although the comic wasn’t very funny, once in awhile it had a drawing of the crazy adventures of little Jeffery. In one of the frames Lil’ Jeffery’s mother would ask him to go and get the mail. The next frame contained his “hilarious” journey through the house, into the yard, into the playground, out on the road, to the mail box, to the fridge, to the bar, into the bathroom and then finally to his mom. The final frame would be his mom asking “What took you so long?” Ugh! On this quest chain I felt just like Lil’ Jeffery. Crisscross the Barrens, then into Durator, into the Barrens back and forth until you finally end up back where you started just to kill some crappy fire elemental that was beside the guy who started the damn quest. Oh, and of course Shammy is only level 10 so I HAD TO WALK THE WHOLE DAMN TIME! Nerd rage! Screw you Blizzard! I had visions of some jackass sitting at corporate Blizzard laughing at me as I ran back and forth.

“Look”, he would yell to his buddies, “another sucker is on that stupid fire totem quest. Pop some popcorn this loser’s going to be awhile.”

Up yours Blizzard!

Well needless to say I finished the quest and I got my stupid fire totem. Big frigin’ deal. I just keep telling myself that this quest chain was an anomaly, after all that running around I’m sure that the water totem at level 20 will be a breeze.


P.S. Blizzard I still love, don’t make me leave the game. I’ll pay extra if I have to.

A Shaman is Born

My most recent endeavor has been to roll and level a Troll Shaman. You may think, “big deal” or “who cares”, well I’ll tell you the little twist I have in store… you ready for this… I plan on leveling all the way to 80 this time! Crazy, I know, but this time I’m actually going to see this one through.

The first decision I had to make was which race was I going to use. Admittedly, the Horde side has many more choices over the Alliance, so I was to chose between Tauren (slow, kind of dull and they take up too much real estate on my screen), Troll (ugly, crappy racial traits, but man can they dance) and Orc (way ugly, better racial traits and cool wolf mount). So I choose a Troll, what can I say I’m a sucker for the cool dance moves.

The second decision was his name. Do you know how damn hard it is to be original any more when it comes to naming your toon. Think of a name right now, any name, now try and use it in the character creator. Go ahead, I can wait…. Didn’t work, did it? It’s brutal; all the original stuff is gone. So now you’re left using a “1” instead of an “l” or some other form of phonetic bastardization. Oh and if the original name that you choose did work, guess what, there’s probably 100 other toons with the same name on other servers. My shaman is Shammydavis, there are a lot of other Shammydavis’s already running around Azeroth. I didn’t know this at the time. I swore I was the wittiest cleverest person ever when I thought of Shammydavis. Sadly, I am not.

So here I am, Shammydavis, ready to take on the world. I am part of friendly little guild that my friends started, For Shatt (s) and Giggles (damn we’re funny). I have my mace and my shield. Everything seems to be ready to go. Wait a minute. I don’t have any 18 slot bags? I have no gold? What the hell is this? Now I’m starting to rethink this whole thing.

My Shammydavis is born to the world and as a level 1 Shaman your attack choices are very limited, as a matter of fact for the first 9 levels every attack was exactly the same. Lightning bolt (usually twice before the mob gets to me) and then CLUB THE HELL OUT OF THEM! One nice thing that has recently happened is Blizzard has decided to make manna and health regeneration much quicker for the first 10 levels. This allowed me to bolt, club and move on with very little down time. Eventually I got my first shock spell (level 2) so my pattern varied enough to include the new spell. Lightning bolt (x2), shock and the CLUB THE HELL OUT OF THEM! That’s it, rinse and repeat for the first 9 levels. Oh sure I got a new shinny totem at level 4, but honestly I don’t think I ever planted the damn thing. Maybe once I threw it out there when I pulled one too many mobs, but as far as early leveling goes I never dropped a totem. Oh sweet ignorance, and then “DING!” level 10!

New Contributor

I am now a poster to a blog. Yikes - I hated English class in highschool which was a long time ago. I am calling myself Alt37, which I think is the current number of toons I have on my WOW account. My daughter treats the character creation screen as her personal Barbie fashion centre. Any way, I will from time to time blog about various World of Warcraft topics. We will see how it goes. Cheers